December 17th, 2023
Dear Diary,
It was the usual for Goadate Sunday at SP. I dusted off all the pink jokes and got some chuckles here and there. I guess they’ve heard them. But I had a chance to check out the confessionals.
After the last few days of digs from everyone about getting the old cathedral boxes cleaned on Friday I blew up at Fr. Tommy. “If it’s so damn important to you, then you get it done!” I shoulda just kept my mouth shut. What does Tommy do but smile and say “If you say so, bishop” and slowly strolled away. Next thing I know, I’m getting a call from McSwiney who says that about a dozen of the young priests were swarming all over the confessionals and with the help of a couple dozen laymen including carpenters and an electritian and women with their stuff and seminarians and the maintinance guys they had taken out old decorations and lost and found stuff that had been in there for only God know how long cleaning stuff the ushers things and the … and the … and the. They had tools and varnishes and lightbulbs and fixtures and polishing goop. It was all nearly over before McS even knew what was going on. All four of them done! He’s furious. He went after Tommy something fierce but – I would have paid money to see this – Tommy dished it back with all the other priests standing by him, glaring. Tommy handed McS his name plate to slide into the slot on the door!!! I’ll bet he turned purple!! McS said Tommy said, “It’s what the bishop ordered. And he wants them used.” I listened to the phone for a while and just told him to make it work. But if he didn’t use them, a lot of people were going to be asking why he fixed them up. At SP this morning there were stacks of people telling McS and me they were so happy to see the confessionals all spiffed up.
After the 10am Tommy and Fr Bill got into the boxes and turned on the lights and right away lines formed. I don’t get it. They make it look so easy. The ushers. I thought they were going to have a fit, but they were elated. They said they had plenty of room in another place and it was worth it etc.
The confessionals really take me back. Gotta hand it to Tommy. Well played. Of course I’m going to catch hell from a few of guys on the priests council and a bunch of the pastors. I can hear it now. “Now people are going to want the same thing.” They’re not going to be happy.
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Fortunately, the friars at my parish don’t usually stoop to the pink jokes anymore. If I have to hear one more time, “It’s ROSE, it’s NOT PINK!” in a homily, I might have an aneurysm.
Sigmund Freud took a psychiatrist friend to a Catholic Church during confessions. He told his friend to observe the faces of people going into the confessionals , the dispair and sadness on their faces. He then told him to observe their faces when they came out. His friend commented that they had completely changed, they were full of hope and joy. Sigmund said, “Why can’t we do that!’
Now that Fr. Tommy has spiffed up the confessionals and returned them to their Proper Use (TM), I bet he will next set his sights on refurbishing the side altars at SP and having them used for Something more August than holding vases and candelabras…
Aw, come now, Your Eminence, you love Fr. “Tommy” more than you want to admit, even to yourself. Maybe the width of the priests’ “box” can inspire a New Year’s Resolution ;)
Our Pastor makes great efforts to give us lots of opportunities for confession. Last night we had 5 wonderful Priests hearing Confessions all over the Church. Hundreds of people showed up and waited in long lines.
Not just old folks like me but families, teens and single people.
During lent he will hold several all day sessions from 9:45AM to 6 PM, in addition to our regular generous weekly times. He really gets “IT”. And he makes sure we get “it” too. I pray that guys like Atticus McButterpants finally wakes up. Maybe Atticus will be visited by St. Michael someday. But would he know what hit him…
can hear it now. “Now people are going to want the same thing.” They’re not going to be happy.
TOUGH, too bad so sad, yes we need them back and staffed
SP again?:-)
Gregg: St Peters
I hope the Bishop isn’t confronted with being asked to bless a same sex couple after Midnight Mass.
Oh, if only this were just parody. Unfortunately, it’s all too true. The faithful are thirsty and desperate for the faith, and our leaders are stuck in the groovy new springtime spirit of whatever. Lord, Have mercy on us.