Mass with the Jesuits

St. IgnatiusDiogenes of CWN wrote something amusing about Pope Benedict and the Jesuits (emphasis mine). 

Yesterday, the Vatican Secretary of State Cardinal Angelo Sodano celebrated Mass for a "pilgrimage" of Jesuits and Jesuit collaborators in St. Peter’s Basilica. After the Mass [can you blame him?] Pope Benedict arrived and addressed the assembly

This reminds me of and old chestnut about how you know of the Masses of different religious orders was successful or not (with a large grain of salt, of course).  So, how do you know? 

A Mass by Benedictines is successful if more than half the notes were sung correctly.
A Mass by Domincans is successful if more than half of them show up for it.
A Mass by Jesuits is successful if more than half of them are still there by the end.
A Mass of Franciscans is successful if more than half of them are still uninjured. 

While clearly an exaggeration, there is a kernel of truth in these stereotypes.  Today, however, this could probably be better applied to parishes, rather than religious orders, no?  Where would yours fit?

 

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4 Responses to Mass with the Jesuits

  1. Fabrizio says:

    “Benedictine”, without question.

    …sigh…

  2. Lydia says:

    A mass at our parish is successful if the sum of the obvious liturgical abuses and the affirmed heresies is less than six.

  3. Henry Edwards says:

    Lydia: ROFL — initially, I guess, though on further thought I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. But may I inquire where you came up with the number 6 in this regard. I lean toward 7 myself, if I count such mild abuses (if that) as

    — 20 personal requests offered from the floor as “prayers of the faithful” (following 7 or 8 general intercessions offered by the priest)
    — widespread hand-holding during the Our Father
    — such a melee at the Rite of Peace that the priest has to wait for it to subside before beginning the Agnus Dei

    What do you count?

  4. Brian says:

    I once had a priest remark that one could always tell if it was
    a Jesuit saying the Mass by the number of women that were around
    the altar.