Because of my long involvement with the über-ultra-hyper secret Vatican Vampire Assassin Squad (and I can’t tell you who is assassinating whom!), I was intrigued by the photo sent me by a priest friend of a vampire hunters kit!
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“This blog is like a fusion of the Baroque ‘salon’ with its well-tuned harpsichord around which polite society gathered for entertainment and edification and, on the other hand, a Wild West “saloon” with its out-of-tune piano and swinging doors, where everyone has a gun and something to say. Nevertheless, we try to point our discussions back to what it is to be Catholic in this increasingly difficult age, to love God, and how to get to heaven.” – Fr. Z
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FRLBJ on Daily Rome (video) 1275 – a trip to the tailor: “By the way, I came across this in as ad for a memory supplement. Thought you might appreciate it. The…”
Gregg the Obscure on Daily Rome Shot 1283 – Laetare at The Parish™: “for as long as i can remember, the Cathedral here has had “sentries” at each Sunday Mass who specifically watch…”
Fr. John Zuhlsdorf on Daily Rome Shot 1283 – Laetare at The Parish™: “Motus ad lusorem cum militibus albis pertinent. Scaccus mattus, scilicet mors regis, quattuor in motis veniat.”
mlmc on Daily Rome Shot 1281: “edm- it is probably better for your soul that you remain unaware of what was said….”
FRLBJ on ASK FATHER: Is speeding a sin?: “I agree with Father, but there are some countries which no speed limits on certain stretches. Also, in this same…”
Fr. John Zuhlsdorf on Daily Rome Shot 1282: “Black to more and mate in 4. [NB: I’ll hold comments with solutions ’till the next day so there won’t…”
Philliesgirl on ASK FATHER: Difference between the “rejoice” of “Laetare” (4th Sunday of Lent) and “Gaudete” (3rd Sunday of Advent)?: “Mothering Sunday was the day that servants were allowed to return to visit their home parishes. Since people didn’t move…”
Figaro on LENTCAzT 2025 – 24: Saturday of the 3rd Week of Lent – Never despair: “In today’s Reading, the Vulgate renders the lechers’ lies under mastic and holm as, “Sub schino” … “Sub prino,” and…”
VocoVeritas on LENTCAzT 2025 – 24: Saturday of the 3rd Week of Lent – Never despair: “Fr. Z; May God have mercy on me, a sinner. I struggled for years with deep despair after losing everything…”
Woody on Friday of the 3rd Week of Lent: Feast of the Five Holy Wounds. Did you know?: “It is in the Ordinariate Missal. https://stlukesordinariate.com/news/about-the-mass-of-the-five-wounds”
edm on Daily Rome Shot 1281: “Not being a German speaker, I wonder if someone could post what the rap was about.”
L. on Daily Rome Shot 1280 – Card. Pell miracle?: “Regarding Archbishop Aguer, I found his observation interesting: Some dioceses have more auxiliary Bishops than Seminarians.”
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“Until the Lord be pleased to settle, through the instrumentality of the princes of the Church and the lawful ministers of His justice, the trouble aroused by the pride of a few and the ignorance of some others, let us with the help of God endeavor with calm and humble patience to render love for hatred, to avoid disputes with the silly, to keep to the truth and not fight with the weapons of falsehood, and to beg of God at all times that in all our thoughts and desires, in all our words and actions, He may hold the first place who calls Himself the origin of all things.”
- Prosper of Aquitaine (+c.455), De gratia Dei et libero arbitrio contra Collatorem 22.61
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"But if, in any layman who is indeed imbued with literature, ignorance of the Latin language, which we can truly call the 'catholic' language, indicates a certain sluggishness in his love toward the Church, how much more fitting it is that each and every cleric should be adequately practiced and skilled in that language!" - Pius XI
"Let us realize that this remark of Cicero (Brutus 37, 140) can be in a certain way referred to [young lay people]: 'It is not so much a matter of distinction to know Latin as it is disgraceful not to know it.'" - St. John Paul II
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Let us pray…
Grant unto thy Church, we beseech Thee, O merciful God, that She, being gathered together by the Holy Ghost, may be in no wise troubled by attack from her foes. O God, who by sin art offended and by penance pacified, mercifully regard the prayers of Thy people making supplication unto Thee,and turn away the scourges of Thine anger which we deserve for our sins. Almighty and Everlasting God, in whose Hand are the power and the government of every realm: look down upon and help the Christian people that the heathen nations who trust in the fierceness of their own might may be crushed by the power of thine Arm. Through our Lord Jesus Christ, Thy Son, who liveth and reigneth with Thee in the unity of the Holy Ghost, God, world without end. R. Amen.
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Love this…Happy New Year, Fr. Z. I hope someone sends you something like this.
Father Z,
I was going to say this could not possibly be the current issue for such an elite congregation. Then I remembered your frequent recitation of the Vatican Motto: “YESTERDAYS TECHNOLOGY TOMORROW” and I fear that I am wrong.
Continue to have a blessed Christmas and a happy New Year Father,
fxr2
Fr. Z,
I don’t think you need the whole kit, just some silver bullets.
Wishing you a Happy and Blessed New Year! [Bullseye. I should keep at least one in each mag of self-defense rounds.]
Wait for a complete set to come on the market; this one is missing the mirror. How will you find vampires if you can’t effectively test the “no reflexion” vampire paradigm?
–Guy
[Good point.]
Is that holy salt in the bottles?
Do I see the Book of Common Prayer in the vampire hunter’s set? Tsk tsk tsk. This is obviously a child’s toy set. No vampire would flee from Cranmer…or at least not before the recent readjustments in the C of E allegiances.
Fr Z, would the Personal Ordinariate make the C of E junior vampire hunters’ kit effective?
[Look on the bright side. They might actually be attracted by the obsolete ICEL versions of the prayers. “O God, you are so lucky that we came today. You are so big. We can do this on our own, help us not to be stiff-necked during our dialogue with undead sisters and brothers.]
Scott W sez: Is that holy salt in the bottles?
Perhaps. I thought it might be diced garlic and some wolfbane.
One can never have too many crucifixes.
I don’t get it (sorry). We don’t really believe in vampires do we?
Silver bullets are useless on vampires, werewolves, now that’s another story. Decapitation works on vamps pretty well, in addition to the old standard “stake-thru-the-chest.”
FWIW, did you know in Bram Stoker’s original novel Dracula, the vampire is finally killed by an American cowboy, Quincy Morris, with a Bowie knife???
Too cool….
Don’t be fooled by imitators! Vampire killing kits are faked all the time. The “real” kits from the 1800’s were attributed to Ernst Blomberg and the cruciform pistol that Blomberg supplied with his kits were made for him by Plomdeur. But I think part of the mystery is that no one even knows for sure if Blomberg and Plomdeur were fake. But the Blomberg kit with Plomdeur pistols are the ones that fetch several thousand a pop at high end auctions – which is why they are counterfeited and sold on ebay pretty regularly.
Still, if it weren’t a sin to sell blessed sacramentals, it might be a cool way to evangelize. Sell reproduction vampire kits loaded with blessed salt, latin/english breviaries and bibles, crucifix, and anything else time-honored and Catholic that one could think to include. With vampires all the rage these days, you’d have sacramentals in every home in no time flat, with curious people trying to figure out what to do with them.
yatzer,
Interestingly, Monsignor Knox renders “vampire” in Isaiah 34:14 where the Vulgate has “lamia” – but he also provides a note about uncertainties in verses 11-15 (New Advent Bible).
It would seem there may be people who believe themselves to be vampires and there are people who consider themselves vampires – and so can or do behave ‘vampiristically’ – as well as living folk-belief in vampires (see the English Wikipedia articles on “Clinical vampirism”, “Vampire lifestyle”, and “Vampire”, respectively). Any use of weapons would surely have to meet normal legal self-defense requirements.
scarda, I find it hard to believe the set includes a book of Common Prayer, for one thing the set also includes the Sacred Heart of Jesus image, not common amongst Anglicans unless they are of the super-high church Anglo Catholic mentality maybe. Although I seem to recall the prayers in the BCP to actually be better translations than the obsolete ICEL: “Lord you are nice. Help us to be nice too”.
Google images shows many such kits, including this. The Common Prayer (1912) does not mention vampires, undead, “evil spirit”, or exorcism. But it has the prayer “that those evils, which the craft and subtilty of the devil or man worketh against us, be brought to nought”.
In passing I note:… it appertaineth to the discipline of the Church, that inquiry be made of evil Ministers, and that they be accused by those that have knowledge of their offences; and finally being found guilty, by just judgement, be deposed.
Way to use the spoiler alert, The Astronomer!
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