"Happy Birthday, Holy Pardner!
With my warmest regards, George W. Bush"
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About this blog…
“This blog is like a fusion of the Baroque ‘salon’ with its well-tuned harpsichord around which polite society gathered for entertainment and edification and, on the other hand, a Wild West “saloon” with its out-of-tune piano and swinging doors, where everyone has a gun and something to say. Nevertheless, we try to point our discussions back to what it is to be Catholic in this increasingly difficult age, to love God, and how to get to heaven.” – Fr. Z
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What’s this? A hat with a rubric? DO THE RED? Yes!
Comtemplating which of the many beautiful surprises he keeps “under his hat” he will next reveal to the delight of the faithful.
Vher on earth did zee rabbit go!?
Hey, where did that tortilla go that I hid in my fancy red hat?
“Made in … New Jersey? New Jersey!”
N.B. No disrespect to Jerseyites: I am merely parodying those old Pace Picante Sauce commercials.
Which way does this thing go? Ah, ok, there’s the tag.
Vait ’til you see vatt I pull out of dis hat next, ja!
Now, I am going to talk through my hat!
“Property of Drapeau’s Costume Shoppe…? You’ve got to be kidding me…”
“That’s funny… I thought I put the lottery tickets in here.”
“Mirror, mirror in my hat, who’s the holiest one at bat?”
“Minzie, sssshhhhhhh, you know Bertonie doesn’t like mice.”
“Hans? Hans Kung? Is that you hiding in my Christmas sombrero?”
“Aight! Which of you peons warped my frisbee!?”
“This is one big beer mug coaster.”
I make this look good…
“Boy, they just don’t make hats like this anymore. I bet I’d look even better in a tiara.”
“Ah!! There is the clarification document!!”
Hey, Rocky! Watch me pull a rabbit out of this hat!
“No one knows that there is a mirror in here!”
“They told me I couldn’t bring the cats when I moved into the papal apartment but………They haven’t heard about the Cat in the Hat!”
“Wait….this isn’t a triregno at all!”
(Yes, I know he wouldn’t have been wearing a Triregno on that occasion)
My Head is how big?!
My head is that big?!
Well at least it matches my shoes.
What gives? Joseph Smith got “another Gospel” out of his hat, and all I see is “7-3/4”.
How do I put this on so it doesn’t mess up my hair?
One size fits . . . me!
Will this hat make me look fat?
Vhat? Made un China? You’fe got to be kidding! Nossing is sacred zese days! Next zey’ll tell me zat the baldacchino is being replaced wiz a cheap knock-off from Thailand!
Suggestions from Experienced Owners
* Print your name, phone number (with area code) – and for the historically minded, the date – with indelible ink, inside the Hat, once you’ve got the correct size. It gives a lost Hat a chance to return home.
* On the beach, or just on the go? You can stuff a key, a business card, a credit card or a little emergency cash in the pocket in the crown.
* Sailing, walking or hiking in the rain? Wear the Hat under your foul-weather hood. You’ll stay warmer, get more protection, and your hood will now move with your head. Your glasses will be better shielded too.
* The brass grommets develop a sought-after permanent patina when exposed to salt air.
* When the anti-sweat band at the front becomes damp, simply reverse the Hat, so it’s on backwards – and be thankful that the Hat doesn’t fit tightly.
* Don’t know where to put your sunglasses? Insert the arms of the glasses through the two ventilation grommets on one side of your Hat and the Velcro® tab inside will secure your glasses. Most glasses will ride there nicely. There are, of course, no ventilation grommets on the LTM, TM (mesh) and TWP Hats.
Holy smokes! MADE by STETSON!!
… This must of cost a fortune!!
.. I better check my Peter’s pence balance!
Just kidding, folks. I am not gonna run for President.
Aha! there’s are my keys!
I’m supposed to where this AND the Zuchetto?!
Made in China?
…tired of talking to intransigent souls on the right and left, Pope Benedict began speaking to his hat. A more profound dialogue took place.
“Who left the marmalade sandwich in here?”
“Piero did have the oddest tastes in altar breads…”
>;)
Not sure of my German but here goes:
Einen Vogel haben.
I have a bee in my bonnet. (I think)!
Hmmm….. I vahnda if I can get zis in a smaller size for Chico?!
Annibale, Annibale… you forgot to put in the lining!
“I just can’t believe it! EVERYTHING is made in China!”
Let’s see, the next bishop of Spokane will be…..
(Vested interest in the next bishop of Spokane)
Mamma & Pappa, I love you and miss you.
What’s this, A secret message in my hat?
“Help! I’m being held prisoner at Gammarelli’s!”
“Why Sancho, it’s the Golden Helmet of Mambrino!”
“So nice of Mr. Bush to give me a Stetson”
“Where’s my rabbit?”
This hat’s fine, but no way am I wearing red cowboy boots.
“Hmm… I know I put that homily somewhere…”
“Anything Smith can do I can do better! I can do anything better than him!”