The glorious Seattle “Free Capitol” Autonomous Zone has survived another day! CHAZ!

The Seattle “Free Capitol” Autonomous Zone has survived another day! Ummm… Capitol Hill Autonomous Zone or CHAZ. Their leader is Raz. Raz of CHAZ!

The Free Autonomous People have posted their demands.

The list published includes the following demands:

“1. The Seattle Police Department and attached court system are beyond reform. We do not request reform, we demand abolition.

“2. In the transitionary period between now and the dismantlement of the Seattle Police Department, we demand that the use of armed force be banned entirely.

“3. We demand an end to the school-to-prison pipeline and the abolition of youth jails. Get kids out of prison, get cops out of schools.

“4. We demand that not the City government, nor the State government, but that the Federal government launch a full-scale investigation into past and current cases of police brutality in Seattle and Washington, as well as the re-opening of all closed cases reported to the Office of Police Accountability.”

Rumors are that businesses are being shaken down for protection money.

But THAT would never happen in a Free Autonomous Zone run by these mostly peaceful protesters.  So misunderstood.

These secessionists not allowing illegal immigration, by the way. And they’ve built a wall.

Meanwhile, in Minneapolis, the mostly peaceful protesters took over a former Sheraton Hotel.  HERE   The place was “turned into a sanctuary for people experiencing homelessness”.  The hotel owner is trying to evict, but, imagine, some people don’t want to leave!  I love the way this is worded:

Activists had received the tacit permission from the owner Jay Patel, who was confronted with the alternative of evacuating his hotel and having it possibly burned down as nearby buildings on Lake Street went up in smoke. When it opened, organizers said it would be theirs to keep, believing they would receive funding from non-profit or government agencies to run the hotel as housing for people experiencing long-term homelessness.

The two groups may or may not have connections.  But the results have overlaps.

So, what could possible go wrong in the Free Autonomous Zone in Seattle!

About Fr. John Zuhlsdorf

Fr. Z is the guy who runs this blog. o{]:¬)
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  1. “4. We demand that not the City government, nor the State government, but that the Federal government launch a full-scale investigation into past and current cases of police brutality in Seattle and Washington, as well as the re-opening of all closed cases reported to the Office of Police Accountability.”

    So, they want to entrust their precious investigation to the whiteracistsexistbigothomophobe Trump???

  2. Bthompson says:

    I think you’re trying to cloud the issue with logic; these people don’t have that.

  3. Semper Gumby says:

    Perhaps a Hitler Bunker YouTube meme is in order.

    The scene: The basement of a looted and grafitti-covered building inside the Seattle Autonomous Zone.
    Marijuana smoke lingers in the air. Sitting at a table is the Warlord, the Council of Elders stand before him. By the light of a lava lamp they’re looking at a map of Seattle spread open on the table, the small perimeter of CHAZ circled in red.

    Tarantula Jane points at the map: “The government put Drum Circles here, here and here. Our people are wandering outside the perimeter.”

    Warlord, staring off into space, muses: “In the Before Time, in the Long, Long Ago, we covered Seattle with Drum Circles. Now they use them against us.”

    Bald Skull sets down his spear and shield and points at the map: “They set-up Starbucks kiosks across the street from our perimeter, here, here and here.”

    Warlord, grimly: “We’ll grow our own coffee.”

    More Doritos glances around the room anxiously, then says: “Dear Leader, our gardens are planted with pot and popcorn.”

    Tarantula Jane, sadly: “Dear Leader, it’s over.”

    Warlord takes off his glasses with shaking hands. “Everyone leave the room except for Bald Skull.”

    They file out quietly and close the door. Warlord bangs the table and yells at Bald Skull: “Not enough Struggle Sessions! The people binge watch Netflix! Pizza deliveries are intercepted! The people are worthless and weak!”

    Finally, Warlord slumps over in his chair.

    Bald Skull ponders for a moment, then says: “We can burn more books. And bathe less.”

    Warlord drains his soy latte, wolfs down the last bag of kale chips and stands up. He claps Bald Skull on the shoulder as they walk to the door: “Nah. Let’s do what we always do. Get me Nancy Pelosi on the phone.”

  4. Simon_GNR says:

    Not the most important issue by a long way, but I’m pleased to read the correct grammar in this: “We demand that not the City government, nor the State government, but that the Federal government launch a full-scale investigation…”
    Any British protest group issuing such a demand would very probably have written “that the Federal government launches a full-scale investigation…” British speakers of English are almost all entirely ignorant of the existence of the subjunctive mood. As someone who has always lived in England, I’m aware of it only because of my school Latin lessons, not from any lessons on the English language.

  5. Lepanto ! says:

    Like a child throwing a tantrum, *sometimes* the best solution is to just ignore them.
    The LAST thing this situation needs is more ‘gubmint control. Seattle deserves this problem and only the local citizens should be the ones to solve it. The Marxist warlords in the CHAZ *want* more State control. We should not be serving that up on a silver platter for them.
    IF the Seattle BLM/AntiFA/posers burn and loot BOTH of the (2) Planned Parenthood locations that frame the Catholic-only-in-name Seattle-U just blocks away from the CHAZ because, of course, {all} Black Labs Matter, then even I might be persuaded to swing by the CHAZ and provide some aid and comfort to the enemy. HA!

  6. ChesterFrank says:

    Raz. Raz of CHAZ has a AK-47and the mayor considers it to be nothing more than a block party. Seattle is the beginning of their rainbow caliphate, and they are just beginning. wow

  7. ChrisP says:

    Why don’t the authorities helicopter drop day loads of soap and disinfectant? The thought of cleanliness will bring them to their knee.

  8. TonyO says:

    One of the wonderful things about these events is that – other than the top one to three people who really know that it’s all smoke and mirrors – all the other people involved in any kind of decision role must be nothing more than over-grown kindergarteners, who have never learned that order does not come from disorder. And because of that, they cannot possibly manage to achieve goals. So it all unravels on them.

  9. Semper Gumby says:

    ChrisP: Good idea. Maybe around the perimeter add loudspeakers blaring John Philip Sousa marches and Churchill speeches. And huge movie screens endlessly playing Red Dawn and WW II newsreels.

    The Portland Zone attempt seems unsuccessful, there’s an attempt tonight in Nashville.

    As for Seattle and the Zone, perhaps there will be a variant of the ancient Roman Social Wars, deciding who grants citizenship or political influence to who.

    Thanks Fr. Z, one wonders where commenter acardnal or JustaSinner is with a quip about “autonomous collectives” and “strange women lying in ponds distributing swords.”

  10. Kathleen10 says:

    Semper Gumby, too true, and it’s hard to know whether to laugh or cry, but More Doritos…lol.

  11. Semper Gumby says:

    Kathleen10: Foiled in Seattle, the Warlord and his gang now roam the semi-apocalyptic wasteland of Washington state in a bus donated by Bus Nuns. Warlord had his two mechanics, Wing Nut and Loose Screw, make some changes. On the roof of MagicBus, there was a sandbagged nest for two archers, behind it a catapult. On a lawn chair welded to the back door a tailgunner perched with a shotgun. To the sides were welded cattle fences and yellow “Yield” signs. A platform was welded to the front bumper on which sat a cauldron of oil, a wood fire crackling underneath. At the approach of MagicBus villagers scatter, children cry and old ladies beseech Heaven.

    The scene: A state road running through farmland in the foothills of the Cascades. MagicBus is stopped in the middle of the road. To the left, fields of hay and clover. To the right the foothills of the Cascades. A few miles behind was the Free City of Gaia. Several hundred yards ahead a stone wall blocked the road, beyond it the town of Altar Rail.

    Warlord stood in front of the bus looking at the stone wall through binoculars, the Council of Elders grouped behind him. [Was JOAN there? After all… “Joan, her Triumph at Tahir!” “Shaka, when the walls fell!” ]

    Warlord, lowering the binoculars: “Two guys. One with a meat cleaver and cafeteria tray, the other with a garbage can lid and a sledgehammer.”

    Tuna Pouch, rubbing his large, hairy belly in which a smiley face had been shaved: “I bet they got Vienna sausages and Snapple.”

    Coal Slaw, nodding: “And gasoline.”

    Bald Skull: “It’s not worth ramming. Rush it I say.”

    Loco Parentis, putting a colander on his head on which shriveled human middle-fingers had been glued upright, then drawing a file across the edge of his battleaxe and testing it with his thumb, then baring his metal teeth at Warlord: “Lizzie is thirsty.”

    Warlord, unsheathing his sword: “Charge!”

    As they charged ahead, a cloud appeared on the mountainside to their right.

    More Doritos, yelling as he ran: “Locusts!”

    Bald Skull, shouting: “By Crom, we will have this wall!”

    Warlord, slowing to a halt a hundred yards from the wall, the others stopping behind him: “Those are not locusts…”

    For a moment they stood there in the road between the wall and the bus, looking at the onrushing cloud.

    Tarantula Jane: “Back in Gaia it’s all-you-can-eat at the avacado bar tonight.”

    Warlord: “Arugula smoothies?”

    Tarantula Jane: “All you can drink.”

    They walked slowly back to the bus, weapons on their shoulders.

    Loco Parentis, grinning: “I bet they got soy-flour empanadas with sugar and cinnamon.”

    [My side hurts.]

  12. Semper Gumby says:

    Gideon, when the jars were broken. Jonathan, when he passed between two rocky crags.

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