At Aleteia, which I also never look at, there is a piece very much worth reading from top to bottom. I’m glad a friend alerted me to this.
A man with sons set them to a hard task. He muses about how boys will rise to the challenge.
Give boys “impossible” challenges and watch them thrive
[…]
The job wasn’t easy. Not at all. I don’t own a chain saw so I sent the boys up with a wood saw to operate by hand. Their task was to take turns until the job was done. I gave them safety tips, helped them get started, and left them to it. After watching for a few minutes, it became clear they didn’t need my supervision or micromanagement. Even though the job is a hard one, they tackled it with persistence and enthusiasm. This was their chance to accomplish a difficult, meaningful, grown-up task.
[…]
And then there’s this…
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To take another example, I was talking to a friend the other day about our parish altar-serving program. When I first arrived at the parish, I was amazed at how many boys there were. (We’re an oratory dedicated to the Traditional Latin Mass and only have male altar servers.) We have about 60 boys who all know how to serve. They exhibit enthusiasm, dependability, and discipline — down to the way they kneel on the stone floor and fold their hands. There are no rebellious comments about our no-sneakers-while-serving rule or complaints about lining up to pray post-Mass prayers in the sacristy. In fact, the boys can’t seem to get enough of it.
I was marveling about this to a friend, who responded, “Do you know how the server program became the way it is?” I didn’t, so he filled me in on the early days of training the boys. Back when everyone was still learning, the boys didn’t yet have the habitual discipline to remain quiet and reverent in the sanctuary. A few of them were misbehaving near the altar, so the young man in charge of training them paused the entire training session, took all the boys outside, and had them do wall-sits to instill some discipline. The boys moaned but accepted their fate. After a few minutes, they actually began to challenge each other and brag about who could do it longer.
They had risen to the challenge and, even more, had begun to increase the difficulty. Today, the boys as a group are the best servers I’ve ever seen. The goal was set before them, the expectations were high, and they rose to the occasion.
[…]
Boys.
They grow up.
TLM families are having lots of boys.
They are treating them like boys, too.
UPDATE 5 Nov ’23:
A reader sent this… it seems appropriate…
I loved your blog pointing out the phenomenon of boys growing up to do hard things. I had to share this picture of 2 of our sons along with other boys helping to clear the land for the Benedictine Whitestone Monastery in Eastern WA state. They tent camped in 20 degree weather and assisted at Mass at dawn enduring the same temps. Father Miller is a wonderful priest and ray of hope!
We attend the FSSP St Joan of Arc in Post Falls and are very grateful for the traditional orders all flourishing in this area (our boys also get to serve Mass for the Carmelites at the Monastery of Jesus, Mary and Joseph just a few miles from our home). I thought you’d appreciate this bit of sunshine in a troubled world.
God Bless,
EW
It occurs to me that that pile of rocks didn’t just happen to be there. That’s another thing they did.
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A beautiful and encouraging story! Providentially, I just read Prov 5:22-23 last night as part of the Bible in a Year readings: “The iniquities of the wicked ensnare him, and he is caught in the toils of his sin. He dies for lack of discipline, and because of his great folly he is lost.” Discipline is key not just to conditioning our bodies but our souls as well, but we live in a culture obsessed with comfort, ease, and the shirking of responsibilities. Discipline, setting attainable, but still challenging, goals/expectations, is one sure way to work against this culture of comfort and re-invigorate it!
As the father of 6 boys, I am grateful for the encouragement of this story and to all parents, especially those parents of boys, be assured of my prayers for you as you raise up the next generation of God’s people, and please pray for me and my wife!
My wife and I have been blessed with four boys (aged 10, 8, 4 and 18 months at the time of writing). The eldest serves on occasion at our rotating twice a month diocesan Latin Mass.
He fidgets, and sometimes rocks back on his haunches when kneeling, but he’s gradually got better and better.
My 4 year old can now make the sign of the cross and say his basic prayers. My 18 month old now knows to kneel when first entering church.
My wife is proud of being the mother of boys. To raise boys in the faith is an awesome responsibility (I cannot speak for the feeling of raising girls).
Maybe, with enough prayer and effort on our part, at least one of them might be a priest.
This is my parish! There were 8 or 10 altar servers this Saturday morning, of various ages. All impressive.
And there are LOTS of babies and small children at Mass.
Your last sentence “……expectations….” brought back memories of a principal I knew when I was teaching. She had done her Masters on “Teacher Expectation and Student Achievement”. Expectation works! God bless you, Father.
We have 5 boys. Recently they all 5 served at our TLM and I was MC. Proud papa moment.
I was never an Altar Server. My Son was. Brother Matthew has trained the Altar servers for decades. Visiting Priest and Bishops have commented at the military like precision the Altar Servers exhibit.
One time years ago a very elderly Priest was saying Mass, My Son was serving.. Father was very small and My Son very tall. Father fell backwards and My Son caught him with one hand and stood him upright. Mass continued without missing a beat.
I forwarded this to my son who is training the altar servers at our parish. He is getting some pushback from our pastor who is afraid of some parishioners who might report to the bishop. My son continues to raise the bar for the boys, reminding them of their particular role in serving God and being an example for others in holiness and reverence.
Unable to view photos on either Windows laptop or android smartphone.
@Not, thank you! Your story and the “caught with one hand” brought back memories of someone else who didn’t miss a beat: https://youtu.be/KhFCEwNGzpg – (at that time) Msgr Marini saving the papal ferula.
What an encouraging read in the comments about all the boys serving Mass. At my parish there are 4 families with at least six boys between them. It’s an amazing sight to see and quite a few of them are altar servers. This is the future.
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