Eye of the Tiber satirically “reports”:
Dumbstruck Congregation Listens In Awe As “Judgmental” Pastor Delivers Sound Homily
Encinitas, CA–Listening in shock and horror as a visiting priest delivered what many believed to be a judgmental homily earlier this morning, many parishioners at Sacred Heard Catholic Church in Encinitas, California, were traumatized after listening to what some called “the most sound homily they had ever heard.” “It was disgusting,” one parishioner, Debbie Locke, told EOTT. “This is a Church for goodness sakes.” Others also voiced their concerns saying that such filth should never be spoken anywhere, let alone in a church. “This is the house of God!” parishioner Bob Woodward said. “Is there no place left in the world where we can avoid hatred, injustice, judgment, and sound Catholic doctrine!” According to Woodward, a world that “did not allow for a women’s right to choose, or for two men to love one another” was not a world deserving of the King of Kings. The baffled and furious parishioner went on to explain how he was forced to flee Denver years ago after noticing a more prevalent and uncomfortable trend of sound homilies coming from several pulpits around the diocese. “The Bishop was doing nothing about it, so I fled with my family from Denver so that we could get away from that kind of critical and unwelcoming attitude. I chose to flee so that my Catholic children could grow up in a world that is accepting of all things…even if they’re not even remotely close to being in the same vicinity of being in line with Catholic teaching.”
Who am I to judge?