Fr. Z’s Kitchen: A lunch tribute to #MaximumBeans

Each time tweet attention hungry Massimo “Beans” Faggioli encounters a traditional or faithful person, position, or has a set back, he gets a little sour.  He can’t really help it. He is angling for elevation as a cadre in the New catholic Red GuardsThey advance, stopping on opposition through the interwebs, shouting their slogans and pumping their papalatrous fists skyward.   SMASH THE FOUR OLDS!   Pò sì jiù!

The other day, after the bishops of the USCCB opted not to elect his preferred candidate to a committee chairmanship, Beans was very sour indeed.  Check the Sour Beans! post.

In honor of Maximus’ reaction I hunted up a recipe for Chinese Sour Beans.  It seemed only right in my solicitude for him.   I adapted this.

Here’s most of my mise-en-place.  I was a little lazy in regard to matchsticking the carrots, but, hey.  Also, I scaled the quantity from 4 servings to 1, though I didn’t diminish by much the garlic and ginger.  And I increased the red pepper “heat”.

After putting a bit of a brown on the ginger and garlic, in goes the pork.  I had a pork chop which I sliced up, rather than using the ground pork suggested in the recipe.

Meanwhile, I blanched the beans in two kinds of vinegar, which cleared out the sinuses I can tell you.

Beans to the pork.

Making the sauce, soy into the vinegar… then cornstarch to thicken.


Top with the carrots and green onion.

This was really good.  I happen to like vinegary dishes, and this sure fit the bill.  It had heat from the pepper and the ginger.  The textures were great. It would be better to make it in a larger quantity, however.

I did circle back to to the stove to squeegee up the last drops of sauce for some rice.  Yum.

If you have any hint of a delicate stomach, this might not be the dish for you.  It could, like much of Maximum Beans’ tweets and other writings, produce indigestion in the faithful, thoughtful Catholic.

In any event, for me it produced an enjoyable and, above all, amusing lunch which I now share with the readership to enjoy with me vicariously.

Lastly, say a Rosary for Massimo “Beans” Faggioli.  He is confused about the Rosary.  HERE  Were he here I would have made a double batch of Sour Beans to sweeten with the recitation of a decade.

About Fr. John Zuhlsdorf

Fr. Z is the guy who runs this blog. o{]:¬)
This entry was posted in Fr. Z's Kitchen, Liberals, Lighter fare, New catholic Red Guards and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.


  1. APX says:

    For the beans, did you use fresh, frozen, or canned?

  2. Fresh. I happened to have all the ingredients on hand.

  3. Julia_Augusta says:

    That is a terrific recipe. I also like dishes with vinegar and I like very spicy food. The ginger is good for the winter season. Ginger is an anti-inflammatory, so it’s good for the throat.

    Talking about bean dishes, the Tuscans have a dish called fagioli all’uccelletto which is very good.

  4. Semper Gumby says:

    Fine dining calls for fine music. Fr. Z, you might find interesting this brief sample of the jazz virtuoso Buddy Mercury, his first CD should be out soon. Personally, I find that his soulful yet uplifting vocals and piano playing erases the sourness of “Beans”.

  5. Chaswjd says:

    With all due respect for Semper Gumby, I think the musical inspiration should come from a group named for the legume: I Fagiolini.
    Here is a sample:
    Now if we could have them at mass . . .

  6. VexillaRegis says:

    I agree that fine dining needs fine music! Here’s the perfect choice: Ecce homo qui est faba (before dinner) and Vale homo qui est faba (after). Enjoy this classy and silly piece by James Goodall:


  7. Semper Gumby says:

    Chaswjd and VexillaRegis: Those are excellent music selections, perhaps Buddy Mercury’s record label is barking up the wrong tree.

  8. DanMan says:

    The end product looks absolutely delicious, Father. If you really like sour, try Hot German Potato Salad with a German sausage, or similar, on the side. We’re having that tomorrow for dinner, and I’m picking up the sausages after Mass. I already have the beer.

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