Have yourself a multicultural little Christmaaaaas…

From Religion Law Blog comes A Politically Correct Nativity Play:

Characters: Mary and an Angel.

(Please note that the role of the Angel is Non Gender specific and therefore the person playing the role must be chosen in accordance with an approved diversity procedure)

(Mary is sitting on the floor crosslegged with her eyes shut and her hands on her knees palms up. She is chanting)

MARY: Ohmm, Ohmm, Ohmm,

(The Angel enters Stage Left (or Stage Right depending on cultural preferences)

ANGEL: Mary

(Mary stands up startled, she adjusts her Hijab to cover her face and speaks)

MARY: Who are you ? You interrupted me when I was allowing my Kharma to flow forth and develop my Krishna Consciousness

ANGEL: I am Ahura Mazda, Lord of Light and a messenger of Allah. I have come to tell you that you are to have a child and in his honour every year children everywhere will be given presents regardless of their race, colour, creed, sexual orientation or transgender inclinations

MARY: But how can this be, I am a good Jewish Girl, though I hasten to add not a member of the international Zionist conspiracy or involved in the suppression of the legitimate aspirations of the Palestinian people

ANGEL: All things are possible to Allah. He has the power to turn Teddy bears into Criminals or Global Warming into snowy blizzards so this will be easy for him. The child will be born just after the festival of Divalli. Farewell Mary and may the force be with you.

MARY: Wait, you have not told me what the name of the baby will be

(The Angel thinks for a minute)

ANGEL: It’s funny you should say that but with everything else that’s going on these days I’ve completely forgotten who the baby is

THE END ?

About Fr. John Zuhlsdorf

Fr. Z is the guy who runs this blog. o{]:¬)
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16 Comments

  1. Supertradmum says:

    The trouble is that some people would prefer this “gospel” rather than the Truth, which is a scary thing. Sounds like a masonic script…

  2. pelerin says:

    I read the following in a newspaper article this week on the demise of nativity plays:-

    ‘At xxxx RC Primary School in xxxx there were nativity plays for the nursery.’ (So far so good)
    ‘Headteacher xxxx said: ‘We’re a faith school and it’s part of our annual calendar of festivals and feast days that we study. We respect other faiths and study other faiths. We also do assemblies about Diwali, Judaism and Hinduism. We are teaching our children about the importance of other faiths and how we as Catholics or Christians can learn from other faiths.’

    No wonder our children emerge from Catholic schools with little knowledge of their own faith.

  3. Andrew says:

    What is the definition of Faith if we can speak of Other Faiths? Opinion? Preference? Mode of entertainment? Style?

  4. (X)MCCLXIII says:

    Apropos of Pelerin’s comment:

    I have two sons. The eldest went to the local parish primary school, aged barely four. In his first term his class of four and five year olds (almost none of whom were to be seen at mass) presented an assembly to the school on the topic of … diwali. This in a catholic school in a town where there are relatively few hindus and in a parish where there are almost none (and a school in which there were precisely none).

    The youngest went to a similar school in the next-door parish. In his first term – aged five – he explained to us that “muslims go to mass, too”. This group of four and five year olds at catholic primary school, almost none of whom were to be seen in church from one week to the next (no, make that one year to the next) were being taught about yet another alien belief system. Of course, he had misheard “mosque”, never having heard the word before.

    I’m afraid this kind of thing is mandated by the educational authorities in England, and supported by most diocesan officials and even most teachers. Catholic schools – at least catholic schools in the state system – are barely recognisable as such.

    (Exempli gratia – the youngest’s godfather is a headmaster in a catholic primary school in another diocese. He is committed to the catholic faith and aims to make his school authentically catholic. This has got him into trouble … with the diocesan board of education!)

  5. (X)MCCLXIII says:

    Andrew’s point is also a good one. I fear that the de facto definition of “faith” which is at least acquiesced in by many clergy here in England is “hobby”.

  6. Venerator Sti Lot says:

    Rosacea Alert!

    Using my Wikileaks decoding ring, I have just unscrambled a transmission from the Zoroastrian Liberation Front, “How dare they treat Ahura like any old Mazda!”

  7. Venerator Sti Lot says:

    Rosecea Alert, Grade Bluish!

    I’m being monitored! They’ve taken offence at my preliminary transcription!
    Should read, “How dare they treat Mazda like any old Ahura!” – of course.

    Please, please, I’m just a selfless mAssanger! I’m a servent of the Secret Fire myself, I hate all Spawn of Melkor like the Druj itself!

  8. Banjo pickin girl says:

    I think somebody just OD’d on Mystic Monk…

  9. letchitsa1 says:

    And then there were those who nearly choked on Mystic Monk reading some of these responses…

    I hear some of the stories that come out of supposedly Catholic schools and I see them as perfect examples as to why parents need to continually assert and reassert their right to provide a proper education for their children, including proper religious education. Of course, that would also mean they would need to learn their faith – sadly a difficult concept for some…

  10. irishgirl says:

    Oh, my word….this ‘script’ is weird….
    Multiculturalism run amok.

  11. tonyballioni says:

    I really don’t see what problem people have with their children learning about other religions in a Catholic school. So long as Catholicism is presented as the one true faith, let them teach all they want about Hinduism/Islam/whatever. Heck Hinduism is really quite interesting academically.

    We are called to present our faith as true, but we must remember that other faiths are monuments to man’s search for the divine. Learning about them should actually strengthen our Catholic identity, because we can show our children the uniqueness of our faith.

    Learning about the ways others do things is never bad, so long as the truth of our faith is never compromised.

  12. rakesvines says:

    In theodicy, one might surmise that the monotheistic deity is one and the same – just viewed differently like the story of the 5 blind men who described the same elephant differently depending on what part he was touching. While the Judeo-Christian God is one the same, the so called deity of Islam is nothing but a human construct gleaned from existing faith systems used to justify deviant sexual practices, extortion and violence. Pope Benedict is clear that any theological dialogue with Islam is baseless and unsound. So, this compedium of religiousity is a travesy, a perversion of truth, goodness and beauty.

  13. JMody says:

    Of course, you could also look at this take on Modern Culture and The Incarnation – the People’s Cube, a satire site run by an immigrant from the ex- Soviet Union, speculates on what the mass media would say about the whole affair. The obvious lack of health insurance, the people having kids in barns because they’re homeless, the kooks who say its all because of taxes and enrollment, and on and on:
    First Media Reports of the Nativity

    JUST THE HEADLINES:
    Birth in manger reveals looming crisis in housing, transportation
    Salvation disproportionately benefits the rich, makes the poor even poorer
    Baby Jesus had no medical insurance: another young family failed by the government
    Uninsured parents forced to give birth in back alleys and mangers
    Baby Jesus in state custody
    Social workers declare Mary, Joseph unfit parents: time for the State to step in

    Planned Parenthood’s success story: Herod administration implements ultra-late-term, post birth (up to 2 yrs, or 8th trimester) abortion regimen
    “Savior” born to a transient couple: more proof that anyone can become homeless
    Undocumented shepherds: “We herd sheep Jews won’t herd”

    Who Killed the Dead Sea? Environmental group points fingers

    Now, it’s political satire, so some of their stuff will seem sacreligious, so I left off the direct link, but this captures the same spirit as the “author” of the scene in question.

  14. EXCHIEF says:

    On the positive side I have not, in the past decade, witnessed so many people wishng Merry (or Blessed) Christmas this year as opposed to the “happy holidays” mush. While there is still far too much political correctness floating about I think people are beginning to say enough and get back to what it is all about.

  15. Charivari Rob says:

    Hmmm… The script excerpt makes no mention of tax relief (remember Augustus’ decree) or medical coverage. I hope those are in there in act 2. I doubt I could be interested in this play unless it has easily-drawn parallels to contemporary life.

    Will there be an Act 3 that deals with the family’s migrant/refugee/guest worker status, or is that being saved for the sequel?

  16. Mitchell NY says:

    Why can’t we have a valid expression of our Faith as Catholics? Doesn’t everyone else or do they mutilate their histories as well? I simply can’t stand this. Why does freedom of religion and expression mean everyone except Catholics?

Comments are closed.