Daily Rome Shot 1081 – Giving the shirt off my back!

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Meanwhile, from the Babylon Bee

Demon Kinda Bummed To Be Cast Out In English Instead Of The Traditional Latin

FARGO, ND – Local demon Asmodeus has been cast out of yet another church in rural North Dakota after terrorizing the church members for several weeks. Before spreading his charred wings to fly off to the next town, he complained to local reporters that exorcisms just aren’t the same since they started doing them in English instead of Latin.

“Ey there, ya nasty spirit,” began Father Okanoke in his heavy Fargo accent. “What tha heck ya doin’ around ‘ere? This ain’t the appropriate place to be, ya know? Oh geez – better get on out to the next town, ey? I’ll cast ya out, you betcha!”


As the priest held out a crucifix and recited his own folksy version of the incantation, the evil spirit shrugged and shuffled out to the door with his head down.

“Whatever – I’ve been cast out before. Same deal as always.” said the malevolent servant of the Prince of Darkness. “But seriously – what happened to tradition? What happened to respect for the beauty of the ancient rite of exorcism spoken in traditional Latin? English just isn’t the same, you know? Would it kill people to learn a little Latin? Good grief!”

According to sources, the demon will be moving to somewhere he’ll feel more welcome, like Washington D.C.

In chessy news, in the strangely named CrunchLabs Masters on day two Fabi, my guy Wesley, Nepo Jan-Krzysztof Duda, and Dmitry Andreikin advanced to Division 1. This is a 7 day event, with a bracket format in three divisions that would take too long too explain. Suffice to say that if you lose a match, you drop to a lower bracket where you can fight your way back to the upper. This is what Hikaru now faces.

White to move and mate in 2.

NB: I’ll hold comments with solutions ’till the next day so there won’t be “spoilers” for others.

Priestly chess players, drop me a line. HERE

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And there’s this:

 

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5 Comments

  1. Thomas Stewart says:

    I can see why the demons are upset that they aren’t properly cast out using Latin. The official English prayers probably don’t even use the phrase “cast out”, they just burble about the plight of unhoused Fallen. It’s embarrassing.

    It’s worth noting that old school Satanist idiots still parody and blaspheme the Latin Mass, they never mock the “liturgy” of Father “Call Me Bruce” Hugsalot at Our Lady of Sentimental Drivel. (#atleastyoutried) I suspect they feel their work is done, the repetition of “Earthen Vessels” has driven more faithful Catholics from the Church than a legion of demons.

  2. Not says:

    Love Babylon Bee.
    The santanic mass is the Latin Mass backwards.
    Not the Novus Ordo….speaks volumes.

  3. Senor Quixana says:

    Thank you for the snip from The Most Reliable Name In Fake News.

    I am comforted by the fact that demons are cast out just as effectively in English as in Latin and somewhat bemused that they find it more irksome.

    That raises an interesting dispute. Should we cast them out in Latin as an act of mercy or in English so as to heighten their just punishment?

  4. grateful says:

    You’re right, did not regret watching video.
    (for a second, thought it was going to be a re-enactment).

  5. Not says:

    The Devil fears Latin..

Comments are closed.