Why Summorum Pontificum? Reason #7454 – O the humanity…

Mulier Fortis found this.  This is not my fault.  It’s her fault.  She got it from somewhere else, but it is still her fault, okay?  Don’t blame me.

She wrote:

Courtesy of Hilary over at Orwell’s Picnic. [WARNING!  DANGER!] You click on this link, and then [WARNING! DANGER!] click play. The idea is to see how long you can survive before you have to click stop.

Looking at the link URL, it seems to be a setting for the new translation of the Gloria.  [Yes… they do want to sabotage the implementation of the new translation, don’t they.]

This blog post carries a health warning. I was frozen in shock for 50 seconds. I now need to go and have my ears syringed or something… I also need a restorative brandy. It is not a game for the faint-hearted…

…and certainly not a game for anyone who likes music.

How long did you survive listening to that?

I lasted about 10 seconds into the actual singing.  O the humanity….

About Fr. John Zuhlsdorf

Fr. Z is the guy who runs this blog. o{]:¬)
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  1. zgietl says:

    The music reminds me of something that would play in the background of one of the Sim’s games.

  2. AnAmericanMother says:

    (“I am a trained musician – do not try this at home!”)

    It’s pretty awful, but it’s mostly the fake bossa-nova accompaniment. Once you remove the disgusting piano part (the pianist is actually embarrassed to be playing it, you can hear him backing off the keys) and the ugly call-and-response repetitions a la “I Surrender All”, and get rid of all the syncopation, the melody line itself could be worse. A little tweaking here and there to remove some awkward intervals, sung straight in a chant style (somebody slap that soprano til she stops with the awful vibrato) with a decent organ accompaniment, it could be tolerable. Better than the “Massive Cremation” anyhow.

  3. Oh c’mon! Linus, Lucy, Snoopy, Charlie and the whole Peanuts gang are gonna love this!

  4. TrueLiturgy says:

    NO!!! Just NO! I made it to the end of the first refrain. Mass is not a Musical! The only reason I lasted that long was because I was shocked from just the instrumental!

  5. Nathan says:

    Arghhhhhh! Please make it stop! It was Manhattan Transfer meets Peanuts meets Elevator Music.

    In Christ,

  6. Stvsmith2009 says:

    Sounds more like Peanuts to me. They just need to add an animation of Snoopy dancing to the whole thing.

  7. fatherpatinla says:

    Bad imitation Broadway music here. Yikes, it’s rough. Well, I agree too, it might be a step up from the Massive Cremation. Ah for the Missa de Angelis! I have it every Sunday….

  8. Jim of Bowie says:

    I lasted 30 seconds.

  9. Peggy R says:

    Broadway-like.. a jazz piece. Peanuts good comparison. Winton Marsalas…No. No. Not in church.

  10. I see I am not the only one who thought “Peanuts” as soon as the music started. And I didn’t manage to get to the singing, it was too…………awful.

  11. shadowlands says:

    I shouldn’t have said ‘hate’ I can hear my father telling me to hate is to sin and I’ve got my scruples cap on, today.
    I dislike it, intensely, with the fibres of my being, my nerves jangled and screeched, as I listened, for thirty odd ( very odd) seconds.
    And I like guitar folk music and ‘shine Jesus shine’!!

  12. stgemma_0411 says:

    I agree with those above me who thought this to be something from Peanuts. I likened it to a cross between Snoopy’s theme and the theme from the Cosby Show.

  13. jerricka says:

    The Vatican Rag by Tom Lehrer http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QKWI41G8h_A

    I think I’ve heard this in mass before :P

  14. Jaybirdnbham says:

    Lasted about 10 seconds before hitting the stop button, and I also thought it was right out of “Charlie Brown’s Christmas”! Ewww!

  15. cheyan says:

    I must be desensitized to stuff like this, because I was able to listen to the whole thing. It wasn’t great, and if it were up to me I wouldn’t choose it for a Mass, but it wasn’t terrible, either.

  16. Carolina Geo says:

    I have just re-committed myself to the Traditional Latin Mass. This type of liturgical inanity in the Novus Ordo Mass has caused people to leave the Church in droves. What makes some people think that a re-hashed 1970s worship style will cause them to stay now?

  17. ppb says:

    There’s only one bright side to this: no congregation will EVER sing along with THAT.

  18. Random Friar says:

    I listened to it all. I agree with the Peanuts/Broadway comparisons. The “good thing” is that this is a relatively complicated piece for a parish, so it may not be implemented much (the refrain is easy to pick up, but the body of the Gloria would need a lot of practice).

    The “bad thing,” or “even worse” thing would be that someone would attempt this anyway. I can foresee some parishes doing this for Easter and Christmas to “spice things up,” alas.

  19. Kris says:

    Funny, the comments about Peanuts… I thought the exact same thing when I started playing the clip, and came here to comment to that effect.

  20. Brian2 says:

    I disagree with the Peanuts comparison. The Peanuts music is really really good. I enjoy it more than any other cartoon music, with the exception of the Backyardigans. This ‘Gloria’ on the other hand is something much much worse.

  21. wmeyer says:

    Beyond appalling. Liturgical samba, anyone?

  22. jcons114 says:

    ugh…wow. I didn’t think of peanuts at first, but now that you mention it…bad taste. I actually thought of the horrible music from “Rent”. Anyone else feel that way.

  23. prairie says:

    21 seconds. This sounds like a theme song from some made-for-students movie from the 80’s about self esteem or accepting people with handicaps, which we were made to sit through in school.

  24. AnAmericanMother says:

    Oh, c’mon, jerricka, Tom Lehrer is at least funny! And anybody who can rhyme “pontiff” with “want if” deserves a little respect!

    Although I may not be a good judge ’cause I like Spike Milligan too.

  25. Father Flores says:

    Actually, I made it all the way through……however, it was sustained by imagining Oompa-Loompas singing the whole thing.

  26. WaywardSailor says:

    I can see it now – a chorus line of robed singers strutting across the altar and belting this out a la Bob Fosse while Fr. Hipster Septuagenarian stands at the presidential chair and sways and grooves to the cool Sixties beat.

    Seriously, though, I can’t believe that this is anything but the immature response of a petulant “liturgist” trying desperately to somehow make the new translation “relevant”.

    Saint Cecilia, intercede for us!

  27. frival says:

    I don’t know, I was thinking something from a bad high school musical, although the Peanuts connection certainly rings true to an extent. Ah well, I should probably keep listening to it as that’s likely what my parish will be singing come next liturgical year. They’d probably add a bongo part if they could though.

    On second thought I’m going to go find the Palestrina channel on Pandora and try to forget I ever heard this…

  28. JohnE says:

    That’s funny, Peanuts is what first came to my mind as well. Hopefully someone will “pull the football” before this is ever sung at Mass. I could definitely see some liturgical dancing going along with this, perhaps at a women’s fake ordination Mass.

  29. robertjekeller says:

    Two things:

    #1 I thought the new translation said Glory to God and peace to MEN of goodwill. Where does the people come in?

    #2 anybody with a brain and their dog knows that the Vatican long ago banned glorias and other Mass parts that made the required parts into a chorus and verses. Why are we still subject to this nonsense?

  30. Random Friar says:

    Oh, and Fr. Z., I’m afraid you don’t get off so freely.

    “The mulier whom didst post this, she gave me of the link, and I did repost.” (Internet Genesis 3:12)

    Didn’t work then, doesn’t work now! :)

  31. Del says:

    45 seconds. I started getting cringing twitches.

    If I had to listen to this entire piece at Mass somewhere, I’m pretty sure that I would be crying by the end.

  32. Andreas says:

    I gave it about 20-seconds, but lost situational awareness when the singer started to croon the words of The Gloria. I am sitting here washing out my ears with Haydn’s Harmoniemesse whilst preparing to write a letter about this to the European Court of Human Rights.

  33. ipadre says:

    Sounds like someone needs an exorcism to me! I felt like I was going to be sick.

  34. the_ox says:

    I gave it about a full minute. If you can believe it – it was actually BETTER than the one I am used to hearing at my local Novus Ordo. Think clapping and tambourines.

  35. Pater OSB says:

    Oh. My. Goodness. – there’s much much more… the new Mass settings http://www.giamusic.com/sacred_music/new_mass_settings.cfm

    and the revised Mass settings: http://www.giamusic.com/sacred_music/revised_mass_settings.cfm

    Just look for the little speaker symbols to play samples…. These are dreadful!

  36. I’m pretty sure I heard Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat singing backup.

  37. mgalexander says:

    I have never been able to muster up much enthusiasm for the new translation. I’m just not sure they are worth the effort; they may even be counterproductive. While they are doubtless superior to the current English texts, one gets only so many chances to disrupt liturgical practice. As there is more wrong with the Novus Ordo than the translations alone, perhaps we’d do better to keep our powder dry for a genuine reform (or restoration), even if that means enduring the current texts a while longer. The movement should be directed, at a minimum, toward the Latin ordinary, anyways. If the hermeneutic-of-rupture crowd were clever, they would welcome the new translation and then stonewall any further reform on “pastoral” grounds. Ultimately, I agree with the title of the post, “Why Summorum Pontificum? Reason #7454” — as this Gloria suggests, the new translation will not stop the abuses.

  38. Ana says:

    I gave it 30 seconds. The entire time, I was thinking it was horrible Broadway rendition introduced to the Chipmunks. Thank God I don’t have to worry about this at my parish. If I ever hear this at a parish, I will walk out.

  39. Charivari Rob says:

    Nice catch, Random Friar.

    I made it all the way through, 3 min 35 sec, no problem. Not the best arrangement I’ve ever heard, nor the worst*. It’s a decent theme. Could be executed a little better – but for a demo of something that won’t be in general use for another 13 months, there’s time yet…

    (*Nor the longest. We had a parish organist/cantor who would use an arrangement that came in at 4-5 minutes.)

  40. Gregorius says:

    At first I didn’t even realize that this was a Mass setting! I turned it off after “Glory to God in the highest” for fear I should fall into wrath in some way. Luckily, Fr. Z’s post on Stravinsky’s Mass caused me to head to Youtube to see what it sounded like, and I now have that in my head instead. :)

    Wait, refrain/verse style Glorias are not allowed? PLEASE somebody point me to the relevant documents, I have so many parishes to contact!

  41. yatzer says:

    Good comparison to the Charlie Brown background music. Nice in a Charlie Brown play, awful in church.

  42. jppelt says:

    You mean this wasn’t a joke?

  43. mwa says:

    1) I very much regret to say that you have been misinformed. Despite all the Christmas cards which have failed to confuse the unwashed masses with “men of goodwill” the new translation does in fact use “people.” See
    2) Do you have a citation for the illicitness of the responsorial Gloria? I have been looking for one, and cannot find anything incontrovertible. GIRM 53 does imply it, but unfortunately doesn’t say it outright.

  44. Genevieve says:

    ROBERTJKELLER or anyone who knows the answer, when/ where did “the vatican ban Mass parts that made the required parts into a choris and verses”?? My parish has been doing a gloria like that for at least two years and I would love some documentation to try and put a stop to it.

  45. It did remind me of the Vince Guaraldi Trio’s work for A Charlie Brown Christmas — that cartoon is certainly one of the most pious works in popular television culture.

    This Gloria though — ugh.

  46. Any other priests ready to slap an immediate and total ban on all music copyrighted by GIA, OCP or WLP? If this is an example of their new translation Mass settings, it’s time to get rid of the lot. I’d rather have absolutely nothing sung at Mass than deal with this slop (slop is the G-rated term for what I think of it). I’m thinking the CMAA chant Mass settings are going to be the only permitted settings: http://musicasacra.com/ordinary/ (bottom of the page below the videos of the ICEL settings).

  47. Hans says:

    robertjekeller says:

    #2 anybody with a brain and their dog knows that the Vatican long ago banned glorias and other Mass parts that made the required parts into a chorus and verses. Why are we still subject to this nonsense?

    That may be, Robert, but some people won’t believe it without an official reference. Do you have one?


    Having sung in choirs for many years, my ears are tough; I made it through the whole thing. Then again, I was having visions of a line of women dancing across a Broadway stage in a serpentine fashion, perhaps holding something in their hands above their heads.

  48. pelerin says:

    And we can’t blame a composer as it calls him ‘various.’ (And not Stradi I presume!) Perhaps it was written by a syndicate of musicians, perhaps dance band?

  49. mwa says:

    We let it play ’til the end. I turned it on with no comment to see how my young ones would react. From the 2 in the room: the 7 yr old was in a fit of giggles for the first half, then asked, “Why do they do that?”; the 13 yr old sat and smirked until inspired to get up and do a Vegas-style lip sync.

    Did anyone else notice this came from a composition titled “Unity Mass”? Apparently a grab-bag of as many styles as possible–something for everyone! The GIA describes it: “Musical genres abound in this eclectic Mass setting from Norah Duncan, IV. From the calypso feel of the Gloria to the early American character of the Gospel Acclamation to the gentle lyricism of the Lamb of God, this variety of styles comes together beautifully into an inspiring setting that has the power to unite the most diverse assembly.” http://www.giamusic.com/sacred_music/new_mass_settings.cfm

  50. mysticalrose says:

    Wow. It reminds me of that 80’s show “Star Search.” I could just imagine the cantor dressed in metallic purple and making “jazz hands.”

  51. Philippus says:

    I did not know it was possible for me to laugh and cry at the same time.

  52. kradcliffe says:

    I don’t like it. You can’t really clap your hands to it.

  53. lucy says:

    I gathered my children around to listen to this. I then asked them if they would prefer this lovely music (trying not to cringe whilst I said it) or the music that our schola and girls’ choir sing at Mass. The resounding response was what we have at our traditional Mass. Thanks be to God for wee folks sensing the true value of beautiful music when they hear it. Deo gratias!

  54. Jim of Bowie says:

    Vatican long ago banned glorias and other Mass parts that made the required parts into a chorus and verses.

    I didn’t know that. Why do I have to then suffer through verse/refrain at every NO mass I go to?

  55. Gregg the Obscure says:

    The scariest part of this AFAIC is that the composer, Norah Duncan IV, is the same fellow who started the Gregorian Institute of Detroit. Of all the people who ought to know better!

    I had to grin when I saw the download was entitled “Glroy to God”.

  56. mschuster says:

    I was waiting for your voice overlay to bring some message of hope yet there was none. I guess that’s the danger of smart playlists and not being near the controls. I’ve been in enough parishes where congregation-need-not-sing-along (we’re enjoying our voices just fine thank you) Mass parts were used so the experience was similar to the many root canals I’ve endured over the years; this too shall pass.

  57. VivaLaMezzo says:

    What decade is this?
    For those of you who couldn’t make it through the whole thing. I figured I’d try.
    I did start doing the Snoopy-dance! Then the singing started…
    The soprano… I was flashed back to 4th grade and Reading Rainbow.
    1:38 to 1:47 was just wrong…
    Jazz hands at 1:48-1:49
    Funky piano at 2:33…
    What a lame “Amen”…
    Please. Kill. It.

    Seriously, this was the single best arguement for Latin and chant EVAH!

  58. Thomas S says:

    That was a !@#%$*@ trainwreck.

    I don’t even know how long I lasted before the horrible trance was broken and I clicked the “X” button.

  59. lofstrr says:

    Its like ridin’ a bull. The goal is to see if you can stick with it for 8 secs but you might die trying. I think I made it to 6.

  60. Reginald Pole says:

    Ooooh! The Gloria from the Lounge Lizard Mass.

  61. Fr Matthew says:

    I laughed, I groaned, I cringed, I clicked on “STOP!” after 31 seconds.

    I’m singing the Gloria IX to cleanse my ears and memory of the echos of that horrible crime against the angelic hymn.

  62. GordonB says:

    I found the lyrics to be very meaningful—

  63. pcstokell says:

    I was expecting David from “Sesame Street” to join in.
    David Brubeck needs to slap the composer for trying to ape his Mass. Physically. Then perhaps with a lawsuit.

  64. Rob Cartusciello says:

    Sounds like a number from Godspell.

    I will now puncture my eardrums & set myself on fire.

  65. revs96 says:

    I agree with my good friend iPadre: exorcism. This sounds like it’s from a cheesy NBC TV special, not anything that’s Catholic in any way.

  66. Margaret says:

    I found that Gloria inspiring. It has inspired me to pick up my on-again-off-again attempts to write a beautiful, dignified setting of the new translation of the Mass. I am a composer by training, and the mother of a very large family by the grace of God. Because of the latter I rarely get to indulge the former. But I think it’s time…

  67. HighMass says:

    Good melody for a Hootenanny and a great case for acid indigestion! The 1960’s/70’s all over again

  68. MLivingston says:

    robertjekeller… you’re right! All those Glorias on the GIA website say “people” of good will. Father Z, what does the English of the new translation say at that point?

  69. Brother Paul Mary says:

    Well lets hope that this stays over with you guys in America :P

  70. FXR2 says:

    I forced myself to listen to the whole thing and then followed the link to listen to the others. We could be in a lot of trouble. I am not sure about the peanuts comparison, it sound more like a 70’s variety show, ala “Donny and Marie”. I haven’t heard anything like this for some time now.
    God Save Us!

  71. LarryD says:

    I lasted 35 seconds – sounded like a “Glee” episode, or “High School Musical”. While they’re hearts might be in the right place, their brains weren’t.

  72. Will D. says:

    Peace of cake, made it all the way through. It’s not nearly as tedious and ghastly as the “Celtic Mass” Gloria that’s in the OCP Bustin’ Bread that we slog through every Sunday. It’s like a ten mile hike over bad terrain.

  73. Will D. says:

    Er, that should be “Piece of cake.” But you get my drift.

  74. kittenchan says:

    Goodness gracious. There is NO WAY the average congregation would sing that complicated mess. It’s merely a way for the choir/soloists to show off how tricky they can be. It sounds like a performance piece some churches will do for Christmastime when the choir completely ignores the congregation and does its own thing for its own glorification.

  75. MichaelD says:

    Echoing Father Sticha I would like to add that we will never see the end of this garbage until priests and parishes stop paying for it. Its all about the money for GIA, OCP, et al.

  76. Microtouch says:

    My wife & I lasted only a few seconds into the vocals. I wanted to jam an 11/64ths brad point drill bit into my ears. Make it stop Daddy! Please, make it stop!

  77. chloesmom says:

    Way too jazzy for Mass, self-consciously “hip” — our choir directors would lap this stuff up, and the congregation would compliment them on their great music — ugh! Also a rather (pardon me) “half-assed” performance. Yep, would suit our parish just fine. God help us.

  78. I believe in giving everything a fair hearing and letting witnesses complete their testimony. I listened to the whole thing. It would be great to keep me awake late at night on my cross-country drives, and in that setting I wouldn’t mind it at all, but it’s not appropriate for Mass, though I’ve heard far worse.

  79. Mary Bruno says:

    I can hear this at my parish. I’ve heard similar renditions of hymns, etc that make me feel like I am in a piano bar, watching Barney or in preschool.

    Last week we had a hymn which is in the missal or mislette (forget which) and my daughter turned to me and said, “they are singing Mulan” sure enough the music sounded like the segment in Mulan when the older woman is trying to dress her up to be a good bride…

  80. Jamus says:

    I didn’t think of Peanuts myself till I read some of the comments, whereon says I “yeah – that’s what it conveys”… about as “unrecollected for prayer” as one can get.

    I dread the push I see coming on the part of … certain powers that be … to actually use this (or some similar) arrangement (with the soprano part) at mass: I’ll be right in the line of that fire as a choir director.

    There ARE good arrangements coming, I’m sure
    There ARE good arrangements coming, I’m sure
    There ARE good arrangements coming, I’m sure

    Hail Mary, full of grace…
    Hail Mary, full of grace…
    Hail Mary, full of grace…

  81. KristenB says:

    I heard the “Linus and Lucy” bit and turned it off.

    I am hoping that “Alleluia, Give the Glory” doesn’t make it into the Mass with the new translation.

  82. Bryan Boyle says:

    Well..I think I’ll just go out to the garage now and gargle with the used motor oil and oxidized gasoline I drained out of the Lotus this weekend to get the taste out of my mouth. Not for the prayer, but, how long, Lord, must this white martyrdom continue?

  83. edwardo3 says:

    Just in fairness I listened to the whole thing. Having been born at the tail end of the “Age of Aquarias”, and recognizing every bit of this “music”, I think I died a little bit inside. The aftermath of this is that I feel sort of like I did when the police picked us up after the baby sitter smuggled us into a Kiss concert circa 1975, discombobulated, and man, do I have the munchies.

  84. TNCath says:

    I made it all the way through the Gloria. I’m not a bit surprised. This is the trash we are going to be subjected to with the advent of the new translations. It’s going to be 1972 all over again, and we have no one to blame but ourselves because nobody in authority is going to have the guts to clamp down and say ENOUGH.

    Regardless of what we might have hoped for, I’m afraid the new translations aren’t going to make a bit of difference in how the Novus Ordo is celebrated in the U.S. The “Mass of Creation [Cremation],” and other abominable Mass settings will continue with the new translations. Moreover, new settings will be published that will be even worse than those currently in use. Furthermore, priests (and even some bishops) are going to continue to take liberties with the new translations. We will continue to get the “thank you for coming to Mass today” welcome at beginning of Mass; the weather report; the score of whatever ball game is being broadcast during Mass time; the “pray for Mrs. Magillicuddy who died on Friday and will be buried from St. Cunegunda’s on Monday at 10, we pray to the Lord;” our bishop’s personal favorite, “The Lord be with all of you”; and whatever else Father or Bishop X wants to add, change, ad lib, or delete from the Mass UNLESS AND UNTIL somebody explicitly tells them to CEASE AND DESIST, which, I have come to realize after years of naively thinking things would eventually get better, just isn’t likely to happen.

  85. Mashenka says:

    3 sec only before I clicked stop, and both my Siberian cats left the room as soon as it started. They did not even attempt to sing, though it was in their voice-register.

  86. lux_perpetua says:

    my browser crashed three times when trying to play it. coincidence? or guardian angel?

  87. Mashenka says:

    Lux_perpetua, to wash the bossa nova out of my eardrums, I clicked Father’s Solesmes link, and it contained a great blessing, a whole page of “samples” from Solesmes that I listened to to restore my equilibrium:


    Just scroll down a few inches and there are short instructions on the Propers, the Ordinary and the antiphons for the offices– some of them are chants frequently used on EWTN too. They were such a pleasure to hear, after the 3 sec. assault on the ears….

  88. Gail F says:

    Somehow that Stravinsky mass is seeming a bit more palatable now…

  89. Wackiki_Wabbit says:

    I’m glad I’m not the only one who thought “Peanuts” when listening. It’s evocative of the Peanuts cartoon scores, but not as good.

  90. Gail F says:

    Comparing it to Charlie Brown is an insult to Vince Guilardi. This samba or rumba or whatever it is belongs on Dancing with the Stars, not in mass.

  91. Jayna says:

    I don’t know why, but the moment it started playing, Charlie Brown was the only thing I could come up with.

    Lord, that is wretched. It’s not even just inappropriate for Mass, it’s just…bad. Full stop.

  92. jjdill06 says:

    Simply wretched!

  93. richhardprov says:

    The horror……the horror
    I don’t blame you padre, but ny fanily dog Sammy does. He was in the room with me when I played it, and he tried to gouge his own ears out……

  94. lacrossecath says:

    I just smashed my laptop over my knee; reflexive violence.

  95. Jordanes says:

    Okay, there can be absolutely no doubt that this was composed out of intense and perverse hatred of the new translation of the Mass. There is absolutely nothing holy, reverent, or prayerful about this unspeakable atrocity. Frankly it reminds me of elevator music at a mall — music to shop by, but not to pray by (let alone pray through or pray with). There isn’t the slightest hint that the singers are praying, are addressing the Blessed Trinity, or are even aware of being in His Presence.

    GIA delenda est!

  96. Haskell_Catholic says:

    Good Lord! I’m going to say an entire Rosary in Latin to wash that out of my ears.

  97. spock says:

    This is like a musical medusa. Listen to it too long and you turn to stone.

    Thanks to His Holiness for making the old Mass more accessible. That’s where my time and resources are going to go.

  98. tianzhujiao says:

    Perfect to go along with liturgical dance…….:-) Kyrie eleison

  99. Rich says:

    Yet another contemporary, chic version of the commons of the Mass which the congregation cannot follow or sing along with. Whatever happened to active participation?

  100. NobisQuoQue says:

    I can just picture a show choir with bright costumes and glitter — replete with dancing behind the altar. Sad to say, I think a lot of people at your typical Novus Ordo would like this. What a way to pep up your Sunday morning! *sigh*

  101. dominic1955 says:

    Yay, more crap from GIA…whodathunkit?

  102. Miles Propheta says:

    Well, I made it all the way through…

    So, umm… Probably not the most charitable, and referring only to the sheet music, not the misguided souls singing it:

    Kill it. Kill it with fire. In fact, nuke it from orbit, it’s the only way to be sure.

    Still, is it as bad as this? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-NOZU2iPA8

  103. twherge says:

    HOLD ON NOW!!!! I think we must be considerate. If Mass were to be celebrated in an elevator, this music might be exceedingly appropriate.

  104. Geometricus says:

    Funny, right before I listened to this I was listening to Vince Guaraldi tunes on Rhapsody. There his music is classified as “West Coast Cool”. This Gloria obviously attempts to mimic this style but it just ends up coming off as a bad commercial jingle.

    I have heard some compare the corrected translation to some of the first attempts at translating the mass into English during the mid sixties…I don’t buy it, but that would have been the prime popularity for “West Coast Cool”. So perhaps this is someone’s little joke…

    Re: “Massive Cremation”: I think Mass of Creation is OK if you just stick with the Sanctus and Amen. Skip the overblown Gloria and the awful Lamb of God with its stupid tag at the end that sound like an ad for an insurance firm.

  105. frjim4321 says:

    Agree with all those saying the earlier comments were insulting to the musical genious, Vince Guaraldi.

    All anthologies and publishing houses have their share of chaff, and this is but one example; GIA is not the only publisher to have a few bombs.

    This piece is not singable.

  106. pattif says:

    Anyone else old enough to remember ‘Up With People’ from the late ’60s/early ’70s? Bleagh!

  107. francesco1962 says:

    I hope current forma extraordinaria turns into forma ordinaria , vice versa.

    Regards in Christ,

  108. bernadette says:

    That’s exactly the kind of music I endure at the parish where I attend Mass when I visit family in Los Angeles. I notice that few people other then the choir actually sing. I’m sure I’ll be hearing this tune again. Can’t wait!

  109. irishgirl says:

    I listened to the whole thing-it sounds like all the images conjured up by many of the other posters (Peanuts/Up With People/Fifth Dimension).

    NOT something I would want to hear at Mass! Too much like a lounge act / jazz number.

    If I heard this in a parish, I’d walk out.

    Lord, why can’t composers today create DECENT MUSIC? Why does everything have to be so discordant? Oy…..

  110. JaneC says:

    I clicked the links to check out GIA’s other offerings. That was not the worst Gloria setting on offer–check out the one by Liam Lawton, or the ones aimed at African Americans (there is a whole Mass setting based on “Plenty Good Room”). By the way, why is Proulx the only GIA composer who can write a Gloria setting without a refrain? Kyrie eleison. I’m sure I’ll be singing one of these awful things in our church choir soon enough.

  111. MJ says:

    Oh goodness!!! I think I lasted about 15 seconds….

    It reminded me of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-NOZU2iPA8 (check out the link, it is too awfully funny).

    Bring back Gregorian Chant!!

  112. momravet says:

    Listened to it for about 5 secs. Channeled Charlie Brown and tropical drinks with umbrellas in them (also chintzy paper leis).

  113. germangreek says:

    Well, I lasted 12 seconds total. About 1 second of actual singing, just to ascertain that this really was intended to be a liturgical hymn. Ick!

  114. Mariana says:

    Makes Stravinsky’s Mass sound perfectly OK!

  115. laurazim says:

    Hans, who said this,”I was having visions of a line of women dancing across a Broadway stage in a serpentine fashion, perhaps holding something in their hands above their heads,” is SO close to what I thought. Enter the gold sequins and lame`, the top hats and dance pumps……

    Think “A Chorus Line.” “ONE! Singular sensation…”

    Gag. Puke. Yuck. In the words of the venerable Kat over at The Crescat, “Hiss.Spit.Growl.”

    Saint Michael, the Archangel, defend us in battle……………..

  116. Lisa says:

    Have to agree with a number of others. When my husband turned it on, my first thought was, “is this a joke,” and second was “it’s from Charlie Brown!”

  117. joanofarcfan says:

    “Get my bottle out of that lower drawer, will you?”
    W. C. Fields in “My Little Chickadee” 1940

  118. Eoin Suibhne says:

    My six year-old son upon hearing this: “If they played this at Mass everyone would be laughing their heads off.”

    Out of the mouths of babes…

  119. Andrew Mason says:

    That was painful to hear, I made it all the way through and all I could think was that any Mass where this was used would not be conducive to what I consider prayerful contemplation. I had to create a Pandora station of sacred music just to wash this out of my head. I’d like to think that they won’t use this affront to good taste at my parish, but I could see it going either way considering that our music director seems quite fond of this sort of thing. They might very well use it at the “contemporary choir” Mass that I avoid like the plague, although the members of the choir are mostly children and have little actual training so they might not be able to pull it off. We need a movement among those of us who attend the NO Mass and want reverent music and liturgy to eliminate things like this, because it seems like all the music directors love this sort of thing and priests and bishops are afraid of making important calls that might make them unpopular. I guess they think that the majority of parishioners are supporting the “contemporary” music because we’re in the pews, ignoring the fact that many of us are cringing our way through because we love the Mass and either don’t have a better option in our area or else don’t want to abandon the parishes that we’ve loved for a long time. I’ve been with my parish since I was three years old and would have to go to another diocese to attend the TLM, so I would really prefer to have my parish offer a reverent NO Mass. Why is it that parishes will tolerate all sorts of abuses in the name of “the spirit of Vatican II” (liturgical dance, “jazz choir,” the “Mass of Billy Joel” as I call it that they have at my parish’s contemporary Mass), but when you talk about reintroducing Gregorian Chant or some of the other things that were actually reinforced by Vatican II it’s suddenly beyond the pale?

  120. techno_aesthete says:

    Better than the “Massive Cremation,” but not as good as Linus and Lucy by Vince Guaraldi (a.k.a. Peanuts theme song).

  121. AAJD says:

    How is this much different, except perhaps by gradations of iniquity, from the usual piano lounge-bar music one so often hears in church today?

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