I swear I am not making this up. It’s not from Eye of the Tiber. It’s not from Onion. It’s from KOFR.com in Oklahoma. (There’s video!)
Tambourine player tased during church service
EDMOND, Okla. — Most churches encourage praise and worship. In fact, the Bible states, “make a joyful noise to the Lord.”
But 50-year-old Vickey Sue Beyersdorfer apparently went a bit too far. [Perfect.]
Oklahoma County Sheriff’s Department Spokesman Mark Myers said, “Nobody could pay attention to the sermon or what was going on so that’s when our deputy was able to take care of the situation.” [I’m picturing.]
The religious ruckus happened at Victory Church at 1515 N. Kelly Ave in Edmond.
A woman was apparently playing a tambourine too loudly during Wednesday night services.
When she refused to stop, the woman was escorted out by an off duty Oklahoma County Sheriff’s Deputy.
Myers said, “He had to physically escort her outside the church. Once outside, she broke free from the deputy and tried to go back inside, there became a physical confrontation.” [Still picturing…]
According to the arrest report, the deputy was forced to pepper spray and tase the unruly woman. [I’ll bet that rattled that tambourine… in a sad sort of mucus dripping way.]
Myers said, “She was not filled with the Holy spirit. She was not being very Christianly and this is why the folks decided to get her out as soon as possible.” [Who am I to judge.]
Witnesses said the combative Christian was staggering and had slurred speech. [Before she went to church or after being tased?]
Authorities did find prescription pain medication in her possession.
Authorities have not said if that medication was found in her system or if that may have contributed to the incident.
Yes. News story.
Of course what do we all think of when “tambourine” comes up?
You all learned of Zuhlio’s artistic and ecclesial greatness with the hit single Fifty Ways To Rig A Synod. But some of you may not remember his earlier triumph
Best on real events, HERE (again… I’m not making this up) this song went platinum almost as soon as it was released.
Channeling his inner Bob Dylan (who came from Zuhlio’s native Minnesota… also… something Dylan mentions… “Yah… I come from the same place Zuhlio comes from, don’chya know.”), Zuhlio sings of the moving experience of the fake ordination of a woman and her celebratory … not. making. it. up. … “ordination tambourine”.