From “The Private Diary of Bishop F. Atticus McButterpants” – 23-03-12 – Preaching at the Cathedral

March 12th 2023

Dear Diary,

Because it’s Lent and all, I really wanted to inspire people, so I asked the rector if I could do the homilies at the cathedral over the weekend. I’ll take off an extra couple of days during the week to wind down and catch up on rest.

I tried something new, like from the Bible. So I preached about how life is tough, and we are constantly being dragged in one direction or another like Chester does to Fr. Tommy ! That made ’em laugh. But in quiet moments, we need to feel the awesome presence of God. I brought in Abraham and the burning bush. Consumed by fire but not reduced to charcoal brickets. God’s like a warm fire for when we’re feeling down. A divine fire but somehow approachable. Something you can roast a chicken over! It’s like friendly fire.

People seemed pretty moved. There was dead silence. Really reverent! I need to do this at the cathedral more often. After all, I’m the bishop and it’s my cathedral! Gotta be with the people and set a good example for the clergy.

About Fr. John Zuhlsdorf

Fr. Z is the guy who runs this blog. o{]:¬)
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  1. Bthompson says:

    The rector let him preach at the cathedral?
    I would have thought Libsville would have a quite territorial forever rector, letting the bishop preach if “it worked with the cathedral parish schedule.”

  2. Robert says:

    I really look forward to these. It is a surprisingly gentle parody at times. Abraham, Moses, they’re pretty much the same, right? But at the same time, “in quiet moment we need to feel the awesome presence of God.” He’s clueless, but trying. The poor bishop, and his poor flock. And poor Father Tommy!

  3. Josephus Corvus says:

    Your Excellency, Bishop McButterpants,

    It was really great to hear you deliver the homily at the cathedral this past Sunday. That’s why we come to church. We’re not here for any of those old fashioned ideas about the Mass being a Sacrifice of anything like that. It’s all about the homily, so please focus on that. 8-10 minutes is simply not enough. If you don’t make it at least to 15 you’re not trying. Aim for 20 or more. Again, that’s why we’re here. It’s all about you. Also, have you tried the newest technique of engaging your audience? It’s so much more meaningful if, instead of just talking about the readings with a few jokes thrown in here and there, you actually ask real questions and wait for somebody to shout out an answer. It really helps the audience, I mean “congregation”, feel involved! Thanks again for showing up.

  4. Not says:

    Bishop McButterpants may not get along with our Bishop/Cardinal. He refuses to live in the Bishops residence, you know the beautiful building the people paid for as a sign of our faith and devotion. Instead he stays in a attic room of the religious order he belongs too You know, the sandals crowd.. Kinda like when Pope Francis wanted to continue living in the hostel instead of the Vatican.
    I guess we can go from one extreme to the other.

  5. Gregg the Obscure says:

    “It’s like friendly fire.” LOL

  6. DvdH says:

    Does the good Bishop know that there’s a posh Irish restaurant named after him?

  7. hilltop says:

    Dear Father,
    These journal entries are hilarious because soooo close to truth. I have an increasing unease, though, for ol Fatty is starting to closely personify a certain sitting US Bishop….

  8. hilltop says: a certain sitting US Bishop

    Not really. Most Rev. F. Atticus is his own man. I wouldn’t strain to conflate him with anyone in particular.

  9. Mariana2 says:

    “Friendly fire”!

  10. Discipula says:

    @hilltop Bp. McButterpants is too much of a character to be based on a real person.

    However, I have from time to time met real persons who occasionally behaved like a character.

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