VORTEX REPORT: What IS that … portentous plant? That… growth?

Some time ago I was in Kansas City, MO, and I posted about …

Sometime after a frequent participant here posted the comment:

Somebody needs to determine the identity of the tree in the middle of . . . the VORTEX. Especially its Linnaean name. Surely that would be significant?

Mysteriously, on Google Earth, even though the photo is copyright 2010, the tree is a mere seedling. Look here:
View Larger Map

It’s leafed out, so the photo must have been taken in the late spring at the earliest . . . but it’s 1/3 or 1/4 of the size it is in Fr. Z’s photo. And the funnel-like shape is very mysterious . . . . . [one might even say “portentous”!]

[ cue creepy music here ]

Comment by AnAmericanMother

After deep consultation and many … many… mugs of Mystic Monk Coffee… we think we have assembled the necessary remotely … I repeat remotely control probe, powered with heavy fuel.


About Fr. John Zuhlsdorf

Fr. Z is the guy who runs this blog. o{]:¬)
This entry was posted in Global Killer Asteroid Questions, Lighter fare and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.


  1. Lisa Graas says:

    I have GOT to get me some of that coffee.

  2. B.C.M. says:

    Seriously now? Father… Take a step back from the brew… I think we should analyze it for opiates… Maybe have the Agency do some field tests…

  3. tzard says:

    There’s a stop sign glued to the back of that “do not enter” sign. It’s obviously some kind of barrier.

    Yes, I’d use a remotely controlled probe. I don’t want your last words to be “It’s full of stars” or something. ;^)

  4. AnAmericanMother says:


    That does it, I’m ordering my Mystic Monk Coffee immediately.

    My friend at the Cobb County Extension Office is standing by (with HazMat suit at the ready).

  5. AnAmericanMother: IF… IF… we get back any data, I will share it.

  6. pfreddys says:

    But Father…But Father…..I’m kinda getting the idea here that you think it’s a good idea to buy Mystic Monk Koffee?…or am I misteaken?!?!!? [Only if you like good coffee and helping monks.]

  7. GrogSmash says:

    Father, I was thinking of ordering some of the fine brew you’ve been bantering about, but after reading this most recent post, a concern has arisen. I am subject to random drug tests at my job, plus we deal with HazMat on a regular basis. I’m wondering if there would be any kind of interference or cross-contamination possibilities? I would hate to be blissfully traveling through Virginia, only to find that after a mug of M.M.C., I’ve traveled through some worm-hole via a parallel universe directly into the abyss (aka: {cue dramatic music} T H E V O R T E X!)

  8. nanetteclaret says:

    Father, could it be … a TARDIS?

  9. GrogSmash: For someone with the word “grog” in your writing name…

    In any event, Mystic Monk Coffee may be the only shield against the Vortex.

    Think about it!

  10. GrogSmash says:

    Father- good call by you! Placing my order a.s.a.p.! Thanks for the advice!

Comments are closed.